Wow. I haven't posted in awhile. Big surprise - I've been hiding in food and using that to cope with the stress of life. I'm embarrassed to have to come back here and say, "I've done it again."
Currently, I'm reading a book called, "Lush," which is about a thirteen-year old girl who is struggling to grow up in the face of her father's alcoholism. She keeps hearing him make the same broken promises over and over again, and today it hit me: So do I. I keep promising that little girl inside of me (not to mention all my friends, family, Tony, etc., etc) ok, this time, this time I'm gonna do it. And then, something happens - my daughter gets sick, I get sick, Michael Jackson dies (it really was quite tragic for me...I was one of the biggest fans of all time when I was 13), it rains, the wind blows, whatev - and I'm back in the food.
Well, I'm not gonna tell you that this time is gonna be different. I'm not gonna tell you that, because I'm sick of hearing it. I'm sick of hearing myself say it and even more sick of how I feel when I don't follow through with it. So, I'm not gonna say it.
I'm just gonna do it.